Nursing Homes

This is from Aunt EA's morning email regarding Grandma Worthen. It's kind of graphic--but it's life and who knows when it could happen to one of us or someone we love.

After a lot of prayers and contemplation, we have decided to put Grandma into the nursing home. I DID NOT want to do this, but her health has deteriorated so much this past month that is really hard to take care of her. Since her bad stroke last month, she hasn't been able to walk without help and she isn't lucid very much.

Grandma hasn't had control of her bladder at all since her stroke, and really hasn't had good control for a long time. She has a catheter and Foley bag. This wasn't too bad to take care of, but lately she hasn't had control over her bowels either. She was actually getting a little better, but over the weekend, after having to clean her up without the help of an aide, I decided I just couldn't do it any longer. She had a BM overnight and as I was getting her into the shower, she collapsed on me and it was all I could do not to drop her.

Saturday afternoon, Brigit and I decided to run to Price to try and get something for Easter and Carson stayed home with her. We had been gone for about 45 minutes when Carson called me and said Grandma said she needed to go to the bathroom. I felt so helpless, and finally called the nurse, who lives in Castle Dale, and took her away from her family, to come and help her. Carson said he could handle it, but a grandson shouldn't have to help his grandmother go to the bathroom. So this was another reason for this decision.

She had another small stroke Monday night and yesterday I had to have help to get her into and out of bed. The boys were home because of spring break but they go back to school today. For the past month she has required 24 hour care I am really tired. The social worker and hospice personnel have been really helpful into getting the paperwork done to get her admitted, and now I just need to meet with the Medicaid representative. (I don't' know when that will be, I'm still waiting for her to call me.) If everything goes well, we will admit her before this weekend. This really has been one of my biggest fears, that I wouldn't be able to care of her and have to put her in the Nursing home.

The boys are having a hard time putting her in to, especially Carson. He has been extra helpful and has gotten up in the middle of the night with her more times than I can count. (He is going to make a fantastic doctor!) But I can honestly say that I have done everything I could possibly do for her.

And, last night, Mark and I went to visit Grandma Guymon in her nursing home here in Salt Lake. She wasn't in a very good mood. In fact, sometimes I don't want to go visit her any more because she's so depressing. Not very nice of me--I know. But, she seems so ungrateful for all the people (she has visitors almost every single day) that come visit her. She seems so ungrateful that her kids are trying to do right by her by giving her nursing home care. Her kids aren't very healthy themselves, and they know they can't leave her alone.

I told Grandma Guymon she needs to start writing down things that she is grateful for. I should take her a notebook and a marker (so she has to write the words BIG and in COLOR). hehehe....